Tuesday, April 13, 2010

Be sure to read the red at the end!

*Warning: Less Than Happy Post Ahead*

Today started out great. Glee was coming on tonight, I just had a great weekend of travel and I had a blogger meet up with Lindsey and Shannon for some Krishna lunch- curried veggies and coconut rice with a sweet dessert.

Clearly, I get dressed up for school in a tee and running shorts. What can I say, comfort is key!

Menu Action:

Krishna on mah knees:


Then, the tables turned.

My grandfather just passed away.

This makes him the fourth person I know to have passed this year. Along with Concordia sinking and something personal that happened early January, it is becoming too much. Aren't bad things supposed to happen in threes?

How come it is five-sies for me?

What sucks even more is that I can't go home sessions til Friday. I have five exams on Tuesday and review sessions that I absolutely need to go to til then.

I know and love the American Beauty quote, "It's hard to stay mad when there's so much beauty in the world...," but right now, it seems really easy for me to be mad and feel selfish and ask why is this happening?

On a much more positive note, my Grandpa passing away could be a good thing, I guess, in the simplest of terms. He hasn't been able to talk after a stroke since I was in fourth grade (I'm a second semester senior right now) and I can't even begin to imagine how hard that is. Maybe it's just time.

It seems not sad in a way, I don't really feel sad I kind of feel relieved that he doesn't have to not feel left out or not talk and not have energy to do things.

And I'm really hoping he's going to be the last one to pass! (Someone out there, hear me and please, please make that happen!)

In THE most ridiculous news, my Grandpa just came back. From the dead!!! It is so unfair THAT HE HAS TO GO THROUGH THIS PAIN.

The nurses announced him DNR, but then he came back- full color and energy.

Does it make me a bad person to feel more relieved that he had passed? I just want his pain to go away but I am glad I'll (hopefully) get to see him Friday.


  1. I'm so sorry to hear this! Your family will definitely be in my thoughts

  2. So sorry, girl. Thinking of you!

  3. So sorry to hear about your grandpa :( You and your family are in my thoughts.

  4. Not a bad person at all. My grandma could barely breathe and had awful days. When she passed away I was happy that she wasn't in so much awful pain but missed her so incredibly much.

    I hope everything gets better for you.

  5. i dont think it was bad to think that. at least when he was gone his pain was gone too. i would rather a family left early from this world instead of enduring so much pain for so long.

  6. No you are not a bad person. Hang in there honey and I am thinking about you!!!

  7. No no Jenny it does not make you a bad person, you just don't want your grandpa to suffer anymore. Hang in there girl, be strong!!


  8. Oh my gosh, this is incredible!! I don't think you're a bad person for not wanting your grandfather to suffer anymore, but clearly there are bigger plans for his life right now :) Hang in there girl- this sounds like a crazy time for you!! xoxo